A random quote from Buttercup Socks:
“…There is usually a chain of command and breadcrumbs left to the scene of disorder and depravity. Goyner was detergent clean in his execution and had no trail to follow. Any chaos he had made was left behind in Germany – too long a shot to ever discover. He also meticulously planned for what he called to himself ‘The Rising’, where unexpected things happened and needed explosive spontaneous thought to respond to.
The Rising was the magma core of Goyner’s strength which cooled into his rock personality. Inside his mind was a molten hell of maleficent reactions to external stimuli which opened their multi-personalities whenever he was in trouble. This pernicious zone was not only a concoction of stored abuse and pain from childhood suffering surfacing, but also the evil within all of us which few know how to access.
Goyner had been trained by a cruel society and then by himself with an iron determination to bring ‘the rising’ of enmity to the shoal of society. In his warped mind and in real life – the two rarely meeting in agreement – he was battling against the age-old evil force of unfairness. The unfairness of life was not something Goyner could live with in any way. It gnawed into his subconscious from late teenage years until a vigilante mindset (stage two of serial killers) was replaced with the overwhelming feeling that if life was eternal then anyone at random could be fairly punished because we are all sinners in the eyes of the Lord.
If life is timeless, then a person’s time on these pockets of overcrowded planets loosely scattered around the universe, is meaningless in essence. Does a person’s life only mean something if someone or a group misses them? No-one would miss Goyner if he died and this thought gave his powerful mind the idea that he could write his own destiny – as if he had carte blanche to murder because his place in society had been murdered by natural born losers. Once ousted from the fold of sheep fodder, one can only feed the cattle, shear or slaughter them. Goyner went way above the billionaires out there just happy to settle for rudimentary exploitation of the masses for something as petty as money. Everyone knows that money buys you unhappiness, but wanton killing turns you into a God, was his wide of the mark thinking. Goyner was so ambitious, nothing ever felt unachievable. He once wasted three weeks working out how he could possibly kill the whole city to take for it for himself. He lacked the scientific brain and resources necessary to bomb the planet into submission. His ambition was always ahead of his head full to the gills of resentment and bog-standard disappointment. Goyner was set on an unnatural course from birth and it would take a miracle to change his impenetrable, obscure mind.
The Lord said unto him, “Life is unfair and you must walk through the valley of the shadow of evil until you hold hands no more. See light where you see dark and feel good so others are happy tomorrow.” Goyner did not agree. He did not want to identify with the opposing qualities of good and evil. He wanted to transcend those two enemies and start his own form of organic justice and balance. What’s the point of using ‘evil’ if you have no respect for the virtues of ‘good’, reasoned he. I want a new way of feeling good, imagined Goyner, and I can’t find myself if evil is limited.
Maybe lunatics in history have thought in a similar way, but all, each-and-every one of them, ends up just another right hand arm or man of the Devil’s of vicious surprises. Goyner was no exception. He had merely taken evil to the next level. To find himself, he had lost everything.”